Could I Get that with a Side of Moxie?

Yesterday I went to the doctor to follow-up on the results from my sleep study. The doctor took me back to a room with a computer, and downloaded the data that was collected during my sleep. I looked through pages and pages of wavy lines and finally cast an imploring glance at my doctor. He told me that nothing was really out of the ordinary, except I take frequent 'half breaths,' and that I woke up 89 times within a five hour period.

89 times!!!!! you say? Why yes, 89 times. It turns out that there is a narrowing in my upper airway, which the doctor thinks is caused by the allergy and sinus problems I've had since I was a kid. And the whole time he's explaining this to me, I'm just thinking that he sounds like the teacher from Charlie Brown because the voice in my head was shouting, "all of your health problems happen because you're too fat. Fat, fat, fat."

Gosh, the return of that voice. I had almost forgetten it, I had almost persuaded myself that I would, in fact, be ok with out that voice. And that it came back into my life like a screaming freight train. It took the spring from my step and sparkle from my eye. And then I went back to work.

I have to say that I so grateful to have made friends with two really wonderful women who support and love and care about me without any pre-requisite. Did you ever have somebody tell you exactly what you needed to hear, exactly when you needed to hear it without being prompted to say anything? It's a feeling that's not matched by much else. Without going into detail about the issue I was having, my friends came through for me in the form of laughter, Mexican food, and beer. And you know what was strange? That voice disappeared! It didn't fade, or waver, or squeak through. It disappeared.

The rest of the night was filled with much merriment, a little more beer, and even some cardio and strength training. When I woke up this morning the sparkle and the spring had returned. The conclusion to this story is that I will have to wear some ridiculous apparatus so I can actually start sleeping through the night. But this is just an undercurrent to a broader happy ending. Because damn it, I will be ok.

I do what I can wherever I end up
To keep giving my good love
and spreading it around
Cause I've had my fair share of take care
and goodbyes
I've learned how to cry
And I'm better for that...